Choosing Joy

So lately, I've been making more of an effort to look on the bright side of difficult situations. I'm perfectly fine being encouraging to others as they face tough things, but when it comes to something going on in my life, I stink at finding the joy in what's challenging me. 

So much has happened this summer. There have been a lot of ups, downs, and in-betweens to my emotions, thoughts, and experiences. I've been at my best and I've nearly fallen apart. My so-called social life has suffered from my various commitments between classes, internship, and work. I swear, if Michaeleen couldn't vouch for me being alive, most people would probably think I fell off the planet. 

Most of my nights this summer have been spent wishing I was outdoors, at the beach, or with family and friends. Every now and then, I'll get in some time with family and friends, but I've spent a lot of time in my living room, working on projects, papers, and assignments. This isn't the way I wanted this summer to go, but with the completion of this past semester, I am more than halfway through the MSW program at GVSU. Wow. It's a great feeling, yet I know that I haven't been at my best this whole time (and who is at their best 100% of the time anyway?). 

I read my devotionals every morning and one that really touched me was a recent post by Mary Southerland. Excerpts from a Girlfriends in God devotional entitled "Thriving or Surviving?" from the August 11, 2011 are shared below.

God promises that if you know Him you will know true joy. Joy is not merely happiness but rather an unshakable confidence that God is in control. Therefore, He is our one and only source of joy and stands ready, waiting to saturate every circumstance with His presence. As His children, joy is ours to claim. If so, then where is it and why do we not experience a sense of confident celebration as we go through each day?

Choosing joy requires us to identify and eliminate the “joy stealers” in life. You may be allowing a person to take your joy. Maybe some painful experience from a shadowed yesterday is an obstacle of joy in your life today. Perhaps a fearful circumstance or a broken dream is the culprit.

I know life can be painful. I know life is often hard and unfair. I also know that God is in control. Therefore, if God really is God (and He definitely is) then we can and should be people of joy. I have read the final chapter of the Book and we win! Nothing and no one can take your joy without your permission. So, don’t give it! Choose joy! 

I've been facing so many challenges this summer. Adjusting to Jake's move back to the East side has been one of the toughest for me. I know what you're thinking, "Hello Amanda...you're going to MARRY the guy. You'd think a year of long-distance wouldn't be a problem for you." Jake is my best friend. The man I want to spend the rest of my life with. The man I share my ups, downs, and in-betweens with. He's seen me at my best and my worst and he loves me anyway (no make-up, sweatpants, and tears...can I get an amen?). Without him around, I have been in the red on the amount of hugs I require on a daily basis. Needless to say, it's been a long summer without him (but when the visits happen, they have been a big blessing!).


Adjusting to being at my internship, having classes, and going to work has been tough too. I am going from 7 or 8 a.m. to at least 5 or 7 p.m. every night. I know...it's not that bad, but honestly, I have been so drained by the end of the day. Part of what I'm learning in my internship is to establish boundaries and learn how to take better care of myself. To be honest, it's been touch and go with the quality of care I extend to myself, so it's been a difficult road to figuring out how to say no, cut back on saying yes, and establishing when I am available and when I need to take time to myself. This, combined with the crazy schedules, has resulted in little time with family and friends. And for this, I truly am sorry. The people in my life mean everything to me and I am sorry for not always being there and being available like I have been before.


In all of this, I have learned to appreciate the little moments. The unexpected run-ins with friends, the times with family and loved ones, and the small, quiet times of reflection on the drive to work, in watching the sunset, and taking the kayak out on the lake. God has really been teaching me to enjoy these moments, as they come at the perfect time, in the midst of the storms in this life. I find joy in the quiet moments, the laughter amongst friends, and the solace of a hug. I find joy in the struggles and suffering because I know I have a God who goes before me and has already won the battle. I have family, friends, and a man by my side who are cheering me on, loving and supporting me all the way. I am so blessed. I am blessed to be in this struggle and to be given all that I have, challenges and all. I encourage you to seek out the joy in your situation, no matter how difficult it is. God is there, waiting to show you something like this...
 

to remind you of all the good He has for you to keep you going through the messes and challenges. There are people He's placed in your life to remind you of His love and grace, as well as support and love on you when times are hard. I am so thankful for those people in my life, and for those moments. I choose joy more often than not now, and I'm pretty happy about it. 

"God will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy" - Job 8:21

With love,

Amanda